The cannon was loaded.
TOLKIEN EXPLODED!
"Damn, he is gone"
Said Napoleon.

In eighteen-thirteen
Tolkien was not seen
'Cause he exploded
When cannon was loaded.

Who was to blame?
Not any name.
Just an accident
That very badly went.

Eighty long years
People had fears
He was gone forever
Would return never.

But then trumpets rang
And angels sang:
"No longer mourn!
Tolkien is reborn!"

Had this event
Not thusly happen'd
In eighteen-thirteen
We would have seen

"Lord of the Rings" written
- I would've been smitten! -
A full century
Early.